Sarah Avery (dr_pretentious) wrote,
Sarah Avery

My father called just after the sun rose to say the waiting was over. He was literally unable to tell me much else.

A few hours later, my cousin Danny called. Those of my cousins who were able to be at the hospital were worried about those of us who weren't, so they wanted to check in with me, and get my sister's cell phone number. Have I mentioned that I have the best cousins in the whole world?

"He died at sunrise," Danny said. "It sounds all corny, but that's what happened. And now it's a beautiful day in Rochester."

It's overcast here in Jersey. The Weather Channel informs me that, in Rochester, it will be sunny all day, with a high of 74 degrees. The things we think at times like this.

My grandfather lived to see his eighties. He died without pain, in the company of people who loved him. His wishes were honored, meticulously. Nobody is guaranteed an end that good.

I've been so lucky in my misfortune. My mate has been grandly solicitous. My friends are numerous and kind. My family is really good at pulling together. And no matter what, this day was going to come, sooner or later. So, no complaints. Just grief.

Thank you all for your kind wishes and offers of help. The dust has settled enough that I can begin to figure out what to ask for.

I'll need someone to catsit for us while Dan and I go up for the funeral. Because I'm already prevailing upon so many people for catsitting while I'm away at festival, the conference, and the family reunion...oh, that's going to be a rough 4th of July now, isn't it...anyway...I'm hoping to spread around the karmic debt so no one person or household is looking after Sonia for more than one week. Our cat is delightful, but Route 18 traffic is not a trivial thing to ask people to face.

I wouldn't turn down a casserole or two. Past experience with family emergencies tells me that the will to cook is the first thing I lose. Dan and I are omnivores, though I'm trying to avoid fish (mercury exposure, trying to start a family, etc.).

kistha, I'd like to take you up on your offer of crash space for the Wednesday before Writer's Weekend. The energy I was going to spend on playing phone tag just went out the window. I need to simplify my personal universe a bit, and knowing where I'm going to sleep would make all the other ambiguities easier to live with.

Thank you all, dear ones.
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